This was today's reflection from the daily readings...
If we've fallen into sexual sin, Satan may have robbed us of good
relationships, self-respect, innocence, or peace of mind. We can repent,
confess our sins, despoil him, and get back what we've lost to sin. We
can feel as pure and innocent as when we were little children. We can
get rid of guilt and regain peace. Knock the weapons out of Satan's hand
and repossess all your stolen property. In Jesus' name, quickly crush
Satan under your feet (Rm 16:20).
Did you know that by having premarital sex (even if you are married to that person NOW) causes problems? Most people nowadays see sex as something we just do...it's widely accepted. Turn on the TV and a woman is dressed like she's on the prowl. Billboards on the side of the road show men and women barely dressed. Even the magazines you see when standing in line at the check out counter show pictures of women looking like they WANT sex. How can we NOT think sex, even casual sex and non-marital sex isn't ok? Society tells us it's just fine!
But, guess what? It's NOT God's design for us...NOT his plan.
Sex is something I have always seen as "dirty and bad"...men use women for sex, for their own pleasure, ONLY...women are just play things. This is exactly how I have grown up believing. Why? Because I didn't follow God's plan. From my first experience after being raped at 14 years old, I saw sex as something us women HAVE to do to get a guy and keep them happy. Give them sex, and they will love you back. WRONG!!!! Sex is something you save for the person you will spend the rest of your life with. God gave us a wonderful gift to share in marriage. When we misuse this gift outside of marriage, it leaves scars on us that seem to never go away. You become a part of that person, no matter how many, because God says once you have sex with someone, you become one. If this is true...I have become "one" with many and now I am left with feeling used and feeling guilty about all my sexual sin.
BUT, God WANTS me to ditch these feelings. There is hope. I am learning to let go of the guilt. Guilt is from Satan...Satan wants us to hold on to all those horrible feelings because, by doing so, we stay further away from God.
I now spend my mornings talking to God. I am studying and praying and working through all of these horrible feelings, and in doing so, I am feeling CLOSER to God. I'm stained...but God wants me to get as close to Him as possible. My prayer time is like using Tide with Bleach...LOL. Getting rid of all the horrible stains, one wash load at a time.
I am trying desperately to teach my children the right things where sex is concerned, but in today's society, it is so hard. They look at me like I'm nuts. But, I am planting the seed, with hopes that when decision time comes, they may do the right thing. All I can do is pray...and if they think I am being "too old fashioned"...so be it.